So, What Now?
Top tips for the postnatal period…
You’ve been pregnant for months, spent tons of time preparing for labour, birth and the arrival of your precious bundle (or bundles!) You’ve probably ended up with enough ‘things’ for baby that you could fill a small container!
But, once your baby is here…. what do you do with them then? How do you recover from birth? Because whichever type of birth you’ve had there’s going to be a period of physical recovery! And how do you recover physically whilst also caring for this tiny new human that doesn’t know that night-time means it’s time to sleep?
I don’t want to worry you, purely help you to prepare what you can now to make your lives easier later because the first few days and weeks are a bit of a whirlwind and your feet probably won’t feel like they’ve touched the ground. So, let me help by giving you a few handy tips for getting ready for this wonderfully amazing but equally exhausting time!
First, meal prep…. batch cooking is great but if you don’t have time for that then make a little extra of the meals that you do make leading up to your due time and ‘freeze as you go.’ Your future self and your partner will be thanking you because the last thing you want to be doing is worrying about making ‘from scratch’ meals during those early days.
Next is to think about who you want to come and visit in the first few days and weeks. I mean, you might not want anyone around to start with as you and your partner really get to know your baby now they are born, and that’s OK. There is nothing wrong with taking some time out as a family to adjust and get to know each other. If you do want visitors, that’s OK too. But I would advise you to think about prioritising the people that are going to help you, will they bring a meal? will they pop a wash on for you? or do the washing up? If the answer is yes then get them booked in for ‘helping’ duties pronto. If the answer is no then put them off until a later date, have those discussions now, manage the expectations of well-meaning visitors, and make it clear that you will invite them, instead of them inviting themselves!
Make some ‘stations’ around the house, such as the living room and bedroom, of all the essential items that you may need during feeding sessions or when the baby has fallen asleep and you just daren’t move. Think comfort and relaxation; cushions and pillows are a must, also a refillable drinks bottle, a flask for warm drinks, ALL the snacks, and most importantly the remote!
In the first few days don’t be shy with the pain relief (obviously only take the recommended doses!) both paracetamol and ibuprofen are safe to take, even when breastfeeding. This is especially important for you c-section mamas - even if you feel you don’t need it, take it on time anyway!
GIVE YOURSELF TIME, keep it simple, don’t make plans for the first couple of weeks at least, and see how you feel before making any. The physical recovery from birth takes time, don’t rush it, listen to your body, give it the time needed to rest and recover. I’m not going to lie to you, the emotional changes that occur following birth are WILD. One minute you’re so happy and in love with your baby and your new addition to your wonderful family, the birds are chirping and you feel like all is right with the world. The next second you’re crying because you’re so happy and in love with your baby but the remote fell on the floor mid-breastfeeding session and now you’re stuck watching paw patrol and your partner won’t be back for at least 20 minutes whilst he puts your toddler to bed!
Go with your baby’s (or babies!) flow. You might have heard that you can’t spoil a baby and that is absolutely true. Let go of any and all expectations of a routine, don’t get hung up on rigid timings for ANYTHING! You’ll find the whole thing so much less stressful if you follow your baby’s lead, sleep when they do, feed when they show signs of hunger, cuddle them if they want to be cuddled, and try to enjoy this time of bonding and getting to know each other.
Last but not least, once you’ve recovered and your partner has gone back to work, you may start to feel lonely and like the four walls are closing in around you. I promise you, you are not alone and lots of new parents feel this way. So, find out where your local parent and baby groups are held and get yourself along for a warm drink and a chat with some other adults. Whilst this may seem daunting you won’t be the only one feeling a little nervous and you’ll feel much less lonely when you realise there’s a whole group of parents in the same boat!
Whilst this time will feel like you are in it forever, it does pass and one day you will sleep again and your baby will grow before your eyes. People will be full of ‘hints and tips’ ‘do’s and don’ts’ but only you will truly know what is right for you and your family so always trust your gut and go with what feels right for you.
Good luck x